literature

China x Reader: Help, I'm Alive

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Literature Text

I tremble.

You sat in the middle of the restaurant, nails nervously scratching against the side of your jeans.

They're gonna eat me alive.

Your eyes wandered around the small Chinese restaurant. The handsome cashier/waiter sent you a smile as he grabbed the tray with your order and walked down to your table.

Could anyone see you right now? Did they know where you were? Did anyone here know who you were?

He placed the tray down in front of you, and the steaming plate of food let off the most delicious aroma. It had been so long since you've eaten something so…

You couldn't find the right words. It was just not what you tended to eat.

"That is all, aru?" the man asked you, and you felt entirely comfortable around him.

"Yes, thank you."

If I stumble…

You took the plastic fork and scoop in a mouthful, raising the hot food to your lips.

Your stomach let out a growl.

Your phone vibrated on the table, but you already knew who the person was and what the person wanted.

Then a message came in.

It was just asking where you are.

You began to chew the food, making it as thorough as possible. You wanted to savor the food. You probably wouldn't have anything like this after today.

They're gonna eat me alive.

Pick up the phone, another message urged you, but you were too busy eating to care. You were too busy silently celebrating your last day of freedom.

And then the phone vibrated again, another phone call coming in.

Why were they so persistent?

You went to turn it off when a voicemail suddenly came in.

"You better be back within twenty minutes. You better hope on those stars that he'll forgive you for what you've done, you insolent girl. I'm not kidding either. And you better not be eating any of that unhealthy stuff. If you're not pretty, what good are you to the Mister?"

Can you hear my heart beating like a hammer?

Your hands went numb, and the fork fell, clattering against the plate. Your eyes quickly filled with salty tears.

"If you're not pretty, what good are you to the Mister?"

Didn't she realize you were sick of being told what to do? Didn't she understand that you didn't want to be simply "pretty"? Didn't she know that you didn't want to be of any use to the Mister?

"Are you okay?" the cashier/waiter asked from his spot behind the counter. He quickly moved around it to come to your aid, sitting down in front of you. "Something is bothering you, aru?"

You wanted to tell him no—that everything's fine, but you ended up blurting out the truth. "My parents are forcing me to marry."

It sounded like something from the nineteenth century, being forced to marry, but your family was an extremely wealthy family and had been a noble family for centuries. Maintaining the perfect lineage was only the biggest concern. Even your cousins, ones who didn't inherit the manor and all that wealth, were marrying rich folk. They were marrying who the entire family wanted them to marry.

And you were expected to make the same sacrifice.

Your husband-to-be—well, you had never met him, but his family owned a large chain of restaurants and had extreme wealth. You weren't sure of their nationality or race or whatever, but that didn't matter to your family. All they cared for was two things: a noble family name and money.

Money was at the core of your pitiful existence.

"Same here," he answered with a smile. "But she's beautiful, so I've heard, and smart. I'm not really worried, aru."

"But you don't know her. And even then, I'm not supposed to be here. All they want from me is to be pretty because apparently that's the only use my husband to be will ever have of me." You used your fork to scrap through the fried rice, pouting slightly. "For years, they've made sure I didn't eat or do anything that could make me unfavorable. So today's my last day of freedom; I meet him tomorrow, and then any chance of wanting to eat the things I haven't tasted in years or do the things I haven't done in years…I have to do all of that today."

Beating like a hammer.

He stood, offering out his hand to you. You peered at it cautiously, but he grinned. "I don't bite, aru~" He gently took your hand and brought you to your feet. "You don't know me, but I'd love to help you have fun on your last day of freedom." You looked up into his dark irises, at the sincerity in his eyes, and you felt something twitch within you. "I'll even buy you Shinatty-chan!~" He exclaimed that sentence with such a large amount of…adorableness. You nearly melted on the spot from it.

"Excuse me?" You couldn't help the blush that spread across your face. Grown men were not supposed to be that cute, right? "Shina what?"

Help, I'm alive.

"Shinatty-chan!" He pulled his phone out of his back pocket and showed you the wallpaper: Hello Kitty. "Cute, aru!~"

You giggled involuntarily as your hands brushed your cheeks, trying to hide them until the color faded. "Very."

My heart keeps beating like a hammer.

~~~

You stood inside a large, lovely Sanrio store, browsing all the options. Wang Yao, your lovely guide for the day, had promised you a plush from here, and seeing as how he wasn't backing down from that promise, you were determined to find the cutest one possible.

And that choice was oh, so very hard—especially since you didn't want to seem like you were eight instead of twenty-one in front of him.

Hard to be soft.

"This one, aru?" Yao asked, holding up a large Hello Kitty plush. The huge grin on his face was giving you a fluttery feeling you hadn't quite expected before.

"I think they're all cute," you admitted as you picked one up. "I wish I could take the entire store and put it in my bedroom." You suddenly realized that you sounded like you were five again, and you started to stammer, "N-not that I r-really would, I-I-I mean!"

You didn't want him to think you childish. Even if he enjoyed this on a regular basis, that didn't mean you could use that as an excuse to act like a kid.

Tough to be tender.

His hand brushed yours as he grabbed the plush kitten you held in your hands. "Not large enough! You need extra cuteness, aru~"

"I…I do?"

"Of course. Cute girls need cute things!"

He turned away to go find a bigger plush, missing how scarlet your face had suddenly become. Your heart started to beat at a quick, irregular pace, and you lowered your face, turning back to the items on the shelves as you tried to erase this odd feeling within you.

Come take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train.

You guys finally settle on something and decide to head for your next destination. This is how the two of you spend your day; you carry this oversized plush kitty while the both of you do something your mother would otherwise consider "improper".

Because it was. Rollercoasters didn't mix with ladies of high class, and they certainly didn't eat messy corndogs with random guys they had just met at a (cute but) tiny Chinese restaurant. And they certainly didn't carry around large plush toys at the age of twenty-one nor did they dress so casually and commonly.

If your mother were to see you right now, she'd throw a fit and mention something about how your entire wardrobe was less than twenty bucks, and that was definitely not acceptable. Your hair was down and loose, and you hadn't even bothered to do brush it or comb it, so you're sure your mother would be screaming about how you never care for your personal appearance and have to appear decent and pretty at all times.

At all times.

If you're not pretty, what use are you?

Help, I'm alive; my heart keeps beating like a hammer.

A soft yelp erupted from you as the waterfall completely soaked Yao and you. He laughed, and you eventually joined him.

The waterpark. This was your first time ever being here.

When you guys got off the ride, he turned to you and asked, "What do you want to do next, aru?"

Beating like a hammer.

Your heart was sputtering at his sweetness and cheerfulness, and you had the overwhelming desire to grab him and hold him tight. Instead, you smiled and answered, "Why don't you pick? I'd feel terrible if it was only me choosing the activities since you're the one who took time out of your day to spend it with a random stranger."

"Aiyah! Is that what you think?" He was quick to laugh. "How can we be strangers now, (name)? We know so much about each other now, don't we, aru?"

"I…I suppose you." Your mouth fumbled those words as your cheeks flared.

You were really going to miss him.

Beating like a hammer.

***

He had left you a block from your place late at night after you insisted it was better he didn't come near your inane mother. sure, you were scolded terribly much for being out all day doing "wild, dirty things"—according to your mother—and thus you had to go to bed without dinner.

"You don't need it," she had screamed, "considering all the calories you probably ingested today!"

You chose not to argue, like usual, and went to bed.

If you're still alive, my regrets are few.

But you couldn't sleep.

Your entire mind was filled with thoughts of this very day, and of Yao, that handsome man who had so selfishly spent the entire day focusing it on you to make you happy.

Once the engagement was officially up tomorrow, you'd never be able to do this, right?

You wanted to visit him again and again and again, to feel those sweet things your entire body had felt around him. Those emotions were so foreign to you—you, who had only felt the contempt from your mother and the indifference of your father. To you, those emotions felt absolutely wonderful.

Besides, his added naturally attractive looks were just a bonus to his amazing, adorable personality.

Still, it wasn't worth it to dwell on what would never be; that was, at least, what you told yourself in preparation for tomorrow.

Maybe the Mister would be nice…

If I'm still alive, what shouldn't I do?

Sleep became difficult for you, though once you finally achieved it, it was sometime around dawn, leaving you a very limited time to rest. You had to wake around eight in the morning and spent ten minutes showering before you spent the next hour and a half getting ready for brunch with your new fiancée and his family.

I get wherever I'm going, I get whatever I need.

You practiced being polite and submissive and pleasurable company, telling yourself that it didn't matter what he looked like or acted like. This would make your family happy.

And sure, normal people would be like, "I'm twenty-one! You've got no fucking say in what I do with my life!"

But you weren't normal. Despite how harsh your mother was and how much your father didn't seem to care, you loved them very much. And besides, your entire life had been made so…sheltered. You wouldn't survive twenty minutes out there on your own.

Even a random stranger like Yao had to come and help you enjoy your day because you'd have no idea how to properly do it yourself.

You were safe here.

While my blood's still flowing

The dress your mother had picked out was very girly and modest, though there was a slight dip in the neckline to enhance your chest just a bit. It was a little too tight, but it looked great, you had to admit. Your hair looked like perfection, and your make-up made you appear very sweet and mature.

Your mother had managed to get you to look exactly like she wanted you to look.

A doll.

And my heart's still beating like a hammer.

The maids comforted you before your father escorted you out into the backyard for brunch. They knew how nervous you were and told you that the Mister would totally approve of you; you were naturally beautiful and you were naturally nice and you had a lovely laughter. There was no way he couldn't like you.

Your father didn't say a word as they whispered these things to you. He simply grabbed your arm and nearly dragged you out. It was hard to keep up with him in these heels.

Help, I'm alive, my heart keeps beating like a hammer.

Your eyes fell on the dark hair of your betrothed as you neared the table. He was turned from you, happily conversing with your mother.

"And what do you like to do?" she asked him.

"I love to cook! Oh, and shop for cute things!"

You nearly choked on your spit, your eyes closing in on the ponytail.

Your mother forced out a smile, but she didn't really mind you marrying him. His family had a large…chain of restaurants.

You raised your eyes to the Eastern Asian couple sitting near their son, smiling pleasantly at their son's antics.

It was Yao. The voice, the ponytail, the parents, the restaurant…

You couldn't believe your luck.

Hard to be soft, tough to be tender.

"Ah, there she is!" your mother quickly spoke as she rose, gesturing with her hand towards you. "Isn't she just the loveliest sight?"

Yao stood and turned around, a smile spreading on his face. "Absolutely beautiful, Mrs. (last name)."

"Yao," you whispered out.

Take my pulse, the pace is on a runaway train.

"I'm glad I get to see you again, aru~" he murmured as he stepped towards you, taking your hand. "I was sad last night that I forgot to kiss someone as cute as you goodnight." Your entire face was red, even to the tips of your ear. "So how about I kiss you hello?"

Despite both of your parents standing there, he pulled you towards him, his lips capturing yours sweetly.

And you melted into this kiss. Your first kiss ever, and it was absolutely perfect.

When he pulled back, he rested his head on your forehead and whispered, "Marry me?"

All you could do was throw your arms around him as a sob erupted somewhere from within you. This was your second day knowing him, and sure, that wasn't long enough to know someone well, but for once, you were absolutely grateful to your mother for forcing her ideas on you.

Thanks to her, you met this wonderful man.

***
Extended Ending:

It had been seven years since that day in May, and your daughter clung to your legs as she looked out into the gorgeous garden your husband had finished just last week.

"It's beautiful, momma!" she blurted in her broken English, a huge grin spreading across her face.

"It's 'cause your daddy made it," you murmured as you kneeled down to get to her level. You kissed the top of her dark hair and whispered to her, "Wo ai ni, my precious child."

"Wo ai ni, mama!" she chirped cheerily.

Your eyes drifted to the beautiful blue sky, the bronze sun making the entire sparkle. She turned out to be just like her father, and the thought made you smile.

Your marriage to Yao had made you the happiest woman alive.
Song: [link]
"Help, I'm Alive" by Metric

This inspired me to write this, though I feel like the ending kind of sucked, and I certainly feel like I didn't capture China's voice AT ALL. God, I am so sorry for that. :u

Anyway, here is my China reader!! I am working on Pirate!England and Prussia now~

I hope you liked this~

I don't own you or China, but I do own the story line~ ^__^
© 2012 - 2024 foreverbeforenight
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Mintdox's avatar
> screeches <
This had a lovely plot and was well written! I love how you added the plot twist and gave a good subtle hint about the ending here,
"'My parents are forcing me to marry.'
'Same here,' he answered with a smile."
Honestly, good job! You deserve a pat on the back! Huggle!